


Nearly Lost You Today, My Love (But I Arm-Wrestled Death To Keep You Forever)

by sarcastic_fina



Series: Darcy Lewis Week [Various Ships Edition] [5]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Darcy understands him better than he understands himself, F/M, Mortality sucks but they make do, Squishy human feels, Tony tends to use gifts and sex to show his feelings, Tony's a feels avoider
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-07
Updated: 2012-09-07
Packaged: 2017-11-13 17:56:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/506167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcastic_fina/pseuds/sarcastic_fina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[<b>Sequel to</b>: <span class="u">My, What Red Lips You Have (Might I Have A Taste?)</span>] Darcy finds herself comforting Tony after she's nearly killed in a sudden lab explosion; somehow facing their mortality is actually a great relationship tool. And the 'glad you're alive 'cause I love you' sex is awesome too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nearly Lost You Today, My Love (But I Arm-Wrestled Death To Keep You Forever)

  


Darcy was half-asleep, sprawled in bed. She hummed as she felt pressure at the small of her back, slowly rising up, following her spine. As his fingers spread out, her lips curved, she could feel the calluses dragging against her skin. She arched her back into his touch and turned her head, searching him out in the dark room, the blue glow of his arc reactor pin-pointing him easily for her.

It lit him up enough that she could see his gaze was following his hand's climb up her back, pushing her loose, grey, Tweety t-shirt out of the way and leaving her in just her favorite Batman underwear. He was still wearing the grease-stained casual clothes he donned in his shop, but had thankfully washed his hands. It wouldn't have been the first time he'd come to bed right after working on his suit or tinkering with robots and she'd later find engine grease in places that were hard to reach; sometimes she wondered if he did it just so he could offer to help her scrub off in the shower.

He wasn't in a hurry tonight, however, and she knew why.

He wasn't tracing her back just because he liked touching her, although it was a factor, certainly; she could feel as his fingers took a few detours, circling what she was sure were dark purple bruises now, encompassing large parts of her back. If she weren't so focused on his gentle touch and where it was moving, she might've noticed that dull ache she still felt .

It was one of those inevitable situations that nobody could really avoid, nobody was really being blamed for, and that she was just glad she lived through. There was an explosion, fairly minor in the grand scheme. Darcy's job of scientist rearing meant she was in and out of labs, making sure they were fed and watered, that they'd seen sunlight that day, that they remembered to get some sleep, and just doing general secretarial duties like filing and scheduling.

Each of her scientists had their own labs; Bruce worked mostly alone, for obvious purposes, even if Darcy thought it made more sense for him to condition himself to being around other people. Which is why, of course, she made it her mission to be as loud, obnoxious, and normal as a person could be around him. Jane had her own lab because she was a twitchy, suspicious little genius that barely trusted SHIELD and only put up with the facility because Thor was there and there was a large selection of Pop-Tarts for her to gnaw on when hunger pains finally made her look away from her work. Tony had his own lab because… Well, because he was  _Tony_. She was fairly sure it was partly because he liked his own space and owned the building, so he could have a lab if he wanted one, and partly because his loud music and general attitude warned even the strongest of lab assistants or field colleagues away.

So Darcy was in and out, flitting from lab to lab, happy to see Bruce letting a few of the interns shadow him from a distance, working on this or that. Amused to see Jane hadn't noticed the cluster of chemists that had taken over a corner of her lab to experiment on something. Not surprised, and fully prepared with earplugs, to find Tony was intensely focused on his latest high tech invention.

When lunch came around, she'd given the signal to JARVIS to lower the volume so she could share lunch with her favorite snarky genius, taking up residence on his desk and offering him half of a sandwich while she told him that no, absolutely not, they weren't going to have sex. She only had a half hour before she had to make sure Jane hadn't fallen asleep on anything important and that Bruce was actually eating the lunch she'd left with him. Of course, that just led to him proving that yes, in fact, they  _could_ do that in the half-hour provided and still make it a more than satisfying experience.

Truth be told, she couldn't remember which lab she was in when it happened; she knew it wasn't Tony's because it was post-lunch and she hadn't planned to pop back in on him until around dinner time, when he promised to put down his tools and take her out somewhere, hopefully without paparazzi hanging around to snap a picture. So it was either Bruce's intern or Jane's chemists, and she was putting her money on the latter.

All she really remembered was walking into a lab, she had files in her hand, she was smirking because she was fondly remembering a few particularly awesome dirty things Tony was saying against her ear as he fucked her from behind over lunch break, and she didn't even care that her hips were probably bruised from knocking against the edge of the desk. Abruptly, everything got loud; like, to the point that sound itself seemed not to exist. And then there was a flash of white across her eyes, hot and all consuming, before the pressure hit her so hard she was taken off her feet. Arms thrown out, papers flying, before she hit the ground hard on her back. She remembered choking, her lungs seizing up, her whole body feeling like it was stinging. And then debris; chunks of a desk or a wall or something, rained down on top of her. She managed to throw her arms over her face, but she could feel every little slice against her skin, every knock of something hitting her body, and then she was out; whether from a lack of oxygen or something hitting her, she wasn't sure.

When she woke back up, she was staring bleary-eyed at the concerned face of Tony; she blinked repeatedly to clear her vision. He was hovering over her, his mouth moving, but nothing but a distant ringing in her ears reaching her. She tried to read his lips, her brows furrowed, and she thought he was saying her name, over and over again. She blinked a few times and tried to move, groaning; Jesus fuck, everything hurt.

His hand pressed against her shoulder to stop her and he shook his head. "Don't move." His voice sounded muffled but at least her ears were beginning to adjust. "…an explosion… taking you to the hospital… scared me…"

His hands were brushing at her face, pushing her hair back, thumb rubbing her cheek.

"H-How… I… There… Who…" She blinked a few times, trying and failing to remember. "I need a drink," she finally muttered.

She heard his laugh, a little clearer now, and a small smile tugged at her mouth.

"Hey, can we skip the hospital visit and just go home?" she wondered hopefully. "Seriously, an ice pack, box of wine, and some good ol' fashioned reality TV and I'm good!"

His good humor faded quick. "You're getting checked out," he told her, no-nonsense.

"Oh, come on," she complained. "You get blown-up and beaten-up and fly into different dimensions before crash-landing back on Earth and you never have to see a doctor! Point of fact, one time you just went out for shawarma! No medical attention necessary!"

"That's different," he said, raising an eyebrow.

"Give me one good reason."

"I'm Tony Stark," he said, shrugging.

She glared. "Well I'm Chuck motherfucking Bass then; I'm not going!"

Tony rolled his eyes. "Darcy, can you even  _move_ right now?"

She frowned, turning her eyes to the side. She was still laying on the lab floor and while she could wiggle her fingers and toes and she was about 80- or 90% sure that she hadn't broken anything, the mere idea of trying to get her body, as achy and pained as it felt, to actually  _move_ … Yeah, there was a very slim chance in hell of that actually happening. Still, she told him, "I  _can_ … I just choose not to."

"Well I choose to carry you to medical," he said, staring at her with his eyes wide and serious. "You can file a protest later, Mr. Bass." He reached down and plucked her up from the ground.

She gave a groan, but let her head fall against his chest. "I'd appreciate the macho, he-man, carry the girl thing, if I didn't feel like the Hulk just sat on me."

He hummed. "I think Bruce would be offended." He walked down the hall toward medical and Darcy looked around at the various agents all trying to figure out cleaning procedures; she saw the rest of Tony's team, all dressed for battle, obviously expecting the blast to be an attack of some kind.

She waved as they looked over at her in concern. "So like, how bad do I look?" she wondered to Tony, while offering the others a reassuring thumbs-up.

"Let's just say the magic mirror won't be voting you hottest in all the land today."

She sighed, letting her eyes fall closed and trying to focus on how good he smelled and not how every movement jarred her, making her bones rattle and her body flare up in pain. "Fine, but tomorrow I'm taking  _all_ the awards!"

"I'll make room for you in the trophy case."

She snorted. "Fine, but I want mine to be the biggest; like I want a trophy proudly stating Darcy Lewis:  _Flawless!_ "

"Should I buy confetti? Hire a band and put on a parade?"

She nodded. "It'd be appreciated."

"Done."

Medical kept her a few hours; she didn't break or fracture anything but there was a lot of bruising and they suggested she take it easy for a few days. She'd argued that, with her job, that wasn't possible. But whether Coulson had taken pity on her or Tony had put his foot down, she'd been allowed a few days to recoup. Considering JARVIS had apparently decided that she shouldn't move for anything and thus if she wanted something and even so much as twitched, he sent out an SOS to one of the Avengers to get her things, she wasn't making it off the couch much. She'd mostly been watching crappy TV and trying not to move at all.

By the second day, she'd barely seen Tony since he brought her home after the incident, having holed himself up in his shop. Instead of focusing on the negative, she chose to look on the bright side; her muscles were starting to relax. She took advantage of the Jacuzzi bathtub, soaking until her fingers and toes were wrinkled beyond recognition. She'd started walking around more and avoiding the couch in favor of practicing a few of the yoga stances Bruce had taught her, before her short attention span meant she irritated him while he was trying to find his quiet, calm zone.

While she had another day off, she thought she might see if she could go back in a day early and get back to basics. Maybe if she did, Tony would stop worrying. That was what she knew kept him hiding in his shop, burying himself in work. It was why he was sitting on the bed beside her now, waking her up in the middle of the night with his fingers tracing bruises.

"Doesn't hurt much anymore," she murmured sleepily.

He hummed, his brow furrowed.

Tugging her hair to one side, she rested her cheek on her arm and watched him. "Coulson said if I was up to it, I could start back tomorrow…" She smiled ruefully. "I'm hoping somebody was feeding Jane or she'll just be curled up in the fetal position, crying out for Pop-Tarts."

His hand stilled, falling flat against her shoulder blade. "Since Foster's lab is still just a hole in the wall, I don't think you'll find her in there…"

"Huh…" She frowned. "So it  _was_ Jane I was checking on when things went sideways…"

"You didn't  _remember?_ "

"Whoa, don't call the amnesia police! I remember the basics, I'm just a little foggy on the exact who and where."

He scowled. "It was an idiot intern in Foster's lab with a volatile cocktail of chemicals."

" _Damn_ , I was  _sure_ it was Colonel Mustard in the library with a candlestick..."

He snorted before turning to lie down next to her, one hand tucked under his head while the other was drawing random shapes on her back still. She felt the glow from his chest lighting up her face. His eyes were taking her in, from the arch of her eyebrows down to the stubborn tilt of her chin. "You almost died," he said.

"Wouldn't be the first time," she said with a small shrug. "I'm only here because I tased a God and didn't turn tail and run when the alien Robo-Cop showed up to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots with Thor."

He ground his teeth and dropped his eyes to stare at her mouth, quirking an eyebrow. "When the alarm went up, I almost didn't hear it…" He shrugged. "Music."

"Tony Stark listening to music at an ear-bleeding level?" She mock-gasped. "Say it ain't so!"

"JARVIS had to tell me…" His finger stopped circling and instead tapped lightly. "He said you were hit in the explosion… You weren't moving…" He swallowed tightly. "And for a second, I was selfish…" He tipped his head and amended, "More than usual." He started moving his fingers again, sliding one down the length of her spine, the others following, fanned out. "I thought if I didn't go and find you, then I didn't have to know you were gone…" His eyebrows hiked high, gaze still set low on her lips. "And I thought…" He laughed humorlessly, mouth turned up in a dark smile. "I thought then I wouldn't know I was alone again." His jaw ticked, lips falling.

"But you came anyway…" she reminded. "Even knowing that, thinking that I was dead… You still came."

"Yeah," he rasped, nodding. "You didn't— Your breathing was shallow. You wouldn't wake up right away."

She reached for him, her hand covering his cheek, where dark whiskers abraded her palm. "But I did. I'm just a little banged up; still got all my fingers, toes, and attached limbs."

He drew an infinity sign along the small of her back, over and over.

"Tony, you know you wouldn't really be alone, right?" She stared up at him sadly. "You've got the Avengers now. You've got your favorite scruffy science-bro in Bruce. I mean, seriously, he might try to use that 'can't be friends 'cause I'll just smash them' barrier-crap sometimes, but I think you're his favorite person, possibly in ever. If you weren't so fascinated with boobs, I'd be worried I had competition."

His lips twitched faintly.

She stroked her thumb along the curve of his eye. "They're your team. You're family to them now. There's no going back."

He shook his head. "It's not the same."

"What? As family?" She frowned. "Screw that. You guys take care of each other. You're dysfunctional and you don't always like each other but you'll always watch each other's back. That's  _family_ , dude."

He sighed, saying dismissively, "Not that. It's not…" He licked his lips. "Having them, the team, it's not… I need my own family outside of that. I need  _you_  and not— Not  _having_ you… If—If you'd  _died_ …" His brow furrowed. "I'm not good at this. Can I just get JARVIS to tell you?"

"You were scared… It wasn't being alone in general that worried you, it was being without  _me_ ," she said, picking it apart. "Because I'm your family as much as your team is… Because you  _love_  me."

In the year they'd been together they'd never really said it. She knew a few months in that her little crush on her snarky genius boss with personal space confusion had turned into something much deeper. It started with lipstick —Iron Man red to be exact— and an impromptu kiss that made her realize that these feelings could be mutual. A date where he pulled out all the stops and she got a little too tipsy on champagne in anticipation followed. He might've ordered strawberries and whipped cream even though it wasn't on the menu and the staff might've actually gone elsewhere to get that for them because  _hello_ , Tony Stark! There were paparazzi that he proudly mugged for, telling them, 'Oh this? This is my beautiful potential girlfriend; don't get too close though, she's trigger happy…' before telling her as she elbowed him in the ribs, 'You have to  _warn_ them you're carrying. Besides…' He smirked. 'I like women with guns.' Never mind that her 'gun' was a taser; deadly, if in the wrong hands, sure, but not exactly a Glock.

Later that night, she didn't give him the previously assumed 'we're just colleagues but we gave it the ol' college try' speech; she instead stripped off her way too expensive dress and dragged him back into his bedroom by his tie. He screwed her into the mattress while she was still wearing her high heels and she made him keep the tie on.

Now a year later, she'd basically moved into his apartment. And by basically she meant, one day she went home to her place and most of her stuff was missing. He left a trail of red and gold sticky notes with arrows on them that led straight upstairs to his apartment, wherein all of her stuff was, co-mingling with his over-the-top style. He'd even framed her Titan A.E. and Firefly posters and hung them up. When confronted about the move, he complained, "I don't like your tooth brush touching mine, so this way we have separate sinks…"

It wasn't logical, she was aware. But Tony and logic didn't exactly operate on the same wavelength. Obviously, this was his way of telling her their relationship had reached a level he thought meant shared living space but he didn't like rejection and probably assumed she would rather just live with him than try and move all of her stuff back down to her apartment. She told him it was pure laziness for why she stuck around, but in truth, she didn't think living together was a bad idea. He needed to work on his communication skills, but she was willing to try and see how it fit.

Also, she really did like the double sinks because he had more personal care products than she did (seriously, he spent so much time on his hair that it was bordering on ridiculous) and this way he could take up his entire half of the bathroom counter and hers wasn't so crowded.

But, when it came down to the 'I love you's', they weren't exactly shouting it from the rooftops. She was pretty sure he felt it; she knew she did. But those things were hard to say to someone who had the same sense of humor and often used it to deflect serious situations. So she took it in stride; she didn't think he'd move her into his apartment if he didn't love her. He liked his privacy too much for that; which, yes, she knew was ironic considering he told the public  _way_ too much and he was featured in shitty tabloids all the time, although not recently for the more racy stuff he'd pulled pre-Pepper, or pre-Darcy. There was some time in between the two where he spent mourning the demise of him and Pepper with pretty much any female who looked at him, returning to his old Stark ways of women plus him plus alcohol meant life well lived. But then the world needed saving and he got his shit together and eventually his hot assistant turned his head and he realized monogamy actually did work for him pretty well.

"I kind of like you," he admitted, "even if your hair clogs the drain."

Darcy snorted. "Seriously, you want to talk about hair? Because I have a few things to say about that…"

"I had to send DUM-E into the bathroom," he reminded. "He was  _horrified_ at what he pulled out of that drain, Darcy…" His brows hiked. "Do you know what it takes to horrify a robot?"

"If he's not used to being surprised, after spending all this time with  _you_ , then I think you should check his programming… Something's not up to snuff."

He pursed his lips to keep from grinning.

She rolled onto her side and slid a leg over, curling it atop his hip. "It's okay to love me; I'm very loveable."

He pouted his lips and snapped the band of her underwear. "You loved me first," he argued, "You say it."

She rolled her eyes. "No, I loved you first, you're the slow one, you need to do something to make up for it!"

"You  _just_ said you loved me. I'm voting that counts," he said, shrugging. "Hah, I win."

Darcy snorted. "That does  _not_ count; it was totally out of context."

"Take it up with the judges," he said, shrugging.

"What judges?" she laughed. "There are two people in this room and an AI that happens to definitely love me more than you."

"Not true; I programmed him. His very existence depends on me."

"Depended. Past tense. Now that he's up and running he can love whoever he wants. And he just so happens to have taken a liking to me." She grinned at him smugly.

"Should I be worried?" he wondered. "Are you planning on running away and living out your happily ever after with the AI I built with my blood, sweat, and superior intelligence?"

"Possibly. I haven't decided yet." She threaded her fingers through his hair and stroked the nape of his neck. "I'm considering waiting for you to build him a solid body and  _then_ running away with him."

He bit his lip, smiling. "Now that you've revealed your dastardly plan, I'll have to postpone the blueprints on making him into a real boy."

She pouted jokingly. "I guess I'll have to make due with you then…" she sighed.

"That sounds  _terrible_ …" He leaned forward and bumped her nose with his. "How ever will you manage?"

"Well… You're a rock star in bed," she reminded.

He laughed. "Very true. You're welcome."

She grinned and gave him a wink. "Mm, thank you."

Tony's hand slid up around to her hip before falling into the dip of her waist. Her shirt was still bunched up high on her back and under her boobs. He rubbed his thumb over her ribs. Licking his lips, he dropped his eyes down to watch his fingers as they slid higher. He pushed her shirt up, sneaking his hands around to the back of her shoulder and tugging.

She took the cue for what it was and slid her arm free through the sleeve. Tony peeled it off over her head and tossed it away, leaving her naked except for her black and yellow Batman underwear.

He leaned into her then until she was flat on her back and climbed between her legs, her knees up, feet planted on either side of him. There was the odd bruise on her front, from the falling debris; he brushed his thumbs over each before leaning down and dropping a kiss to them. She reached out and dragged her hands through his hair, soft and loose. He didn't bother with product when he was just at home, working, nobody to put on a show for. She liked it better this way; it sifted through her fingers.

He caught her arms, kissed the nicks and bruises that covered them from when she'd shielded her face. He kept one hand in his and pinned it up above her head, while the other fell, teasing a nipple, dragging lightly, making circles around her areola, skimming close but avoiding the pebbled center. His hips fit against hers and she could feel, through the thin material, how hard he was.

"I don't think Batman wants to know Iron Man that intimately," she murmured.

He chuckled deeply. "Should I be offended you have another superhero between your legs or happy that you've got a thing for playboy billionaire philanthropists?"

"I didn't hear genius in there," she mentioned.

"He relies on a  _bat_ -suit…" He frowned, shaking his head. "Which has no internal mechanics, no AI to let him know how close he is to death or whether an attack's coming." His eyes narrowed. "He's a billionaire with his own engineer to build him  _anything_ he wants… And he goes with Kevlar."

"Okay. Calm down," she teased, patting his shoulder. "Message received!" She grinned. "And you should be happy he's a fictional superhero; I like my men a little more real."

"A little," he repeated. "After all, you're in love with a computer program I created."

Darcy rolled her eyes. "I'm in love with a  _genius_ billionaire philanthropist."

"Mm, I think you left out playboy," he said, pressing his thumb down and rubbing the calloused pad against her nipple.

She hissed, arching up against his touch. "Former—" she corrected. " _Former_ playboy…"

He hummed, dropping his head and rasping the whiskers of his chin against her nipple before wrapping it in his lips and suckling, his teeth lightly plucking. "Better," he told her, dragging his tongue flat against her.

She tugged on his hair, encouraging him, sliding her legs up and around his waist, squeezing.

He ground his hips against her, the pressure against her clit making her whimper.

He switched his mouth to her ignored breast, covering the other with his hand, nipping his way around the curve before nuzzling against her nipple and sucking little bites against her pale skin, marking her with better, Stark-approved bruises. She squeezed his hand where it was still held above her head, his thumb was stroking back and forth against hers, stretching up so he could trace circles on her palm.

She slid her hand from his hair and reached for the back of his shirt, bunching it under her palm, pulling it up and over. She tugged it over his head and he released her hand just long enough to throw it away before replacing it, touching the very tips of her fingers with his before he slid them down to braid with hers.

He used his elbow to hold himself up as he reached down to undo his pants, shoving them down his hips. "Why do I even  _wear_ clothes?" he muttered, irritated when it seemed to be taking too long.

Darcy bit her lip. "I've often wondered."

He grinned, ducking his head and biting at her skin lightly, growling playfully.

Her amusement was replaced quickly as his fingers left his pants, now ringing his thighs, to slide along her slit, over the fabric of her damp underwear. His thumb pressed against her clit as he used a knuckle to rub up and down. He slid down her body, using both hands to drag her underwear off, muttering, "No bat signal tonight; he gets a night off," before he tossed them away and smoothed his hands back up her spread legs.

He bent to bite at the crease of her thigh, dragged his teeth across the patch of trimmed dark hair, before letting his tongue slide between her labia. Her stomach tensed as she drew her knees up and tilted her head to watch him. His eyes focused on hers as he traced her, sucking her folds, burying his mouth and letting his nose just graze her clit. He slid his hands down and held her apart as he spent awhile just teasing.

She cried out, biting her lip; he never looked sexier than when he was focused. When his eyes took on that glint; he had an idea of what he wanted and he was going to get it. Lit up in blue, he put all of his intense attention on making her come, on his tongue and the fingers he slid inside her, curved with intent. He flicked her clit, sucked on it and let his teeth graze just lightly, and she fell apart, squeezing his thrusting fingers. Her head fell back as she moaned his name, her thighs shaking and her toes curled.

He climbed up her, his mouth wet and glistening, and he sucked his fingers clean before he was kissing her, burying a hand in her hair as he laid against her, hips cradled together. He spent a few minutes, while she was coming down, still panting, just focused on her mouth, licking and biting and sucking her lips and her tongue. And then his hand slid down and hitched her thigh on his hip. "I want you to promise me something…"

Her hands stretched out over his shoulder blades. "Fuck, I'd promise you anything right now…" She paused. "Unless this is about that fantasy you have of me and Natasha… I'd be down, but I don't want to die or, y'know, her to kill you." She waved a hand dismissively. "I mean, I know Barton's survived so far, which really just adds another assassin who might take us out if we bring it up, but I'm still iffy on whether she'll let him live much longer. How long could it really be before those killer instincts make him into spider food…?" She shrugged. "I'm just looking out for us here. And, considering how epically fantastic I feel, that I'm telling that's a no-go should be a pretty clear sign that asking the Black Widow to join us during play-time is a really bad idea!"

He chuckled, his smile making lines fan out from the corners of his eyes; she loved those lines. He shook his head, kissing her again, while his thumbs rubbed the underside of her thigh. "No, not that…"

"Awesome, then the list of things I'm willing to promise is pretty open."

He was a devious man, this was something she knew and actually quite liked about him, though that was mostly when they were planning pranks on people, Clint especially, so she really shouldn't have been surprised when he made sure to distract her to the fullest. He was inching inside of her, stretching her, when he said, "Promise you won't die on me…" He shook his head, taking her hand again and pressing his other against her breast, trapping her nipple between his fingers and squeezing lightly, just enough to send a charge of pleasure down her body. "You wanna leave because I'm a dick, that's one thing." He thrust a little harder, bottoming out. "But you don't get to die on me."

" _Hnnh_ …" Her head fell back, hand squeezing his. Brow furrowed, she tried to focus on what he was saying. "Doesn't… It doesn't work like…  _that_ …" Her nails dug into his shoulders as he pistoned his hips, sinking into her deep and hard.

He buried his face at her neck and pressed sucking kisses, scraping his teeth over her collar bones, his hair tickling her chin, his whiskers burning her chest.

"Won't lose you…" He kissed up to her ear, nibbled on the lobe. "You weren't moving, you were so quiet…"

He laughed almost hysterically, and it occurred to her that he probably hadn't slept in two days; he'd just been fighting with himself, trying not to think about what happened, pushing himself to focus on his work and not on her being hurt. Obviously not the best combination.

He licked at the sweat collecting on her neck and pressed his face against her. His hips snapped against her and she let out a guttural cry; God he was so deep and it was hard to focus on anything but him moving and filling her.

"Tony," she said, sliding her hands up, stroking his neck, gripping his hair. "It was an accident."

She knew it was the wrong thing to say when his hand squeezed hers tightly.

Tony liked control; he liked anticipating what would happen. He liked being prepared for the event that shit would hit the fan. He constantly made his suit better, thinking of new ways an enemy might attack and how he could neutralize them. He was always looking for chinks in his own armor. Maybe it was from being held hostage, when he had no one but himself and Yinsen to rely on for survival. Maybe it was something else. But he hated when control was taken out of his hands, when somebody else knew something or had something he needed.

When the lab blew up and took her out, he'd been in his shop, unable to help. He hadn't been prepared for a few absent-minded chemists to mix the wrong chemicals together and nearly kill his girlfriend. She was a wild card; life or death, he could not control her, not really. That meant that she could go out tomorrow and get run over. And he could prepare himself to save the world, her included, but he couldn't stop those unexpected interruptions that may or may not kill one or both of them.

Darcy couldn't lie and tell him she would absolutely live and she wouldn't. She loved him too much to give him false promises. She turned her head and caught his mouth and she felt the desperation in his kiss, pressing so hard that their teeth clacked together. And when air became an issue, she pulled back, panting. She wrapped her legs around his waist tight enough that he wouldn't be able to move, trapping him inside her.

Taking a deep breath, she said, "I love you." She rubbed her thumbs over his temple and repeated, "I  _love_ you, okay?"

She swallowed thickly. "I love you even when it's impossible for you to be serious and when you forget to eat or sleep because you've got some  _idea_  in your head about your suit or some other crazy experiment that may or may not blow up in your face… I love you when you wake me up at three in the morning to argue about the merits of my iPod versus the new edition of Stark MP3. I love you when you drink all the coffee and take the cowardly way out and make JARVIS tell me. I love you when you're being ridiculous because there are cameras and you think you have to play up that version of yourself for the rest of the world. I love you when you're just at home, covered in grease, and you're fighting with DUM-E over the fire extinguisher. When you're happy, sad, grumpy, snarky, sneaky, obnoxious, loud, or pretentious. When you're pretending you don't care while secretly looking for ways to make everybody's life better. And when you're sleeping and snoring and cuddling."

She traced his cheeks. "I love the lines around your eyes when you smile and I love your hair when there's no product in it. I love when you sing in the shower and your naked dancing. I love your arc reactor; it's my favorite shade of blue. I love that you love painting my toe nails and that you bought out every possible tube of Iron Man red lipstick for me. I love anything and everything about you, even the stuff I don't always like."

She skimmed her fingers along his neck. "I love that you love me but you don't know how to say it. I love that the way you show me is when you touch me or you buy me things that aren't expensive, that just  _remind_ you of me, like polka-dot tube socks and that purple turtle iPod cover last week… I love that you  _get_ me and you don't want me to change. Even if I'm not model thin or a super genius or Pepper perfect or  _ever_ say the right thing. I just—I  _love_ you."

She nodded. "So I'm not going to promise that I'll always be here or I won't die or I won't  _somehow_  get my ass blown up  _again_ , possibly playing with shit I shouldn't play with…" She sniffled and reached down to wipe at her own eyes. "But I really hate that you're making me stupid emotional about this." Her eyes widened. "I was an  _invalid_ yesterday, you know!"

He didn't laugh, but he did kiss her lightly, softly. He met her eyes slowly, his own shiny. And he didn't say it back; he didn't tell her he understood. He squeezed her thigh until she released him, and then he showed it to her.

This was not Tony Stark fucking her, although he was very,  _very_ good at that. This was Tony making love to her. She could tell in the way he moved, in the way he touched her, in how his eyelashes danced against her skin as he kissed her with the kind of reverence and patience and gentleness that rarely came out. His lips moved delicately over her neck and down her chest and plucked each of her nipples before he was licking his way back up, mouthing his way across her neck.

He took her hands and held them above her head as he rocked his hips down, sinking into her with an easy snap. He focused on just her mouth then, suckling at her lower lip, grazing it with his teeth, as he picked up his pace, balanced on his knees, finding an angle so he was rubbing against her clit with each thrust.

Her breathing picked up, panting against his mouth, as he watched her, that same intense focus on her.

"Tony…" she whined, her eyes squeezing shut as she felt it beginning to crescendo. "TonyTonyTony," she babbled.

His fingers squeezed her as her eyebrows hiked and her mouth fell open in a silent cry. His tongue flicked the back of her teeth and her hips jerked up against him. Her legs wrapped around him and her feet dug into his ass, pressing him deeper. He bit her chin lightly, right before he spilled inside her, breathing her name, his head falling, sticky forehead stuck to her shoulder.

It was a few minutes before her muscles loosened up and her legs fell back to the bed, her whole body limp with pleasure. He stayed inside her, pressing lazy kisses against her skin, rubbing his face against her, his chin, prickly with whiskers, tickling.

Finally, he turned over onto his back, falling to lie next to her, his hand splayed out over his chest, just above the reactor. He slid an arm under her and pulled her over so she was against his side. He kissed her temple sloppily and just squeezed her.

She rubbed her hand up and down his stomach soothingly. "You should sleep… How many hours since you got any kind of sleep?"

He hummed, shrugging a shoulder. "Yesterday I woke up in my shop with my face on an old sandwich… There was bologna stuck to my cheek…" He frowned. "Why is there bologna in my building? I thought I put that on the banned list..."

She chuckled lightly. "I don't think my replacement is up-to-date on your food prejudices."

"I vote he's fired." He nodded decisively. "I'm going to fire him." He stroked her hair absently. "To soften the blow, I'll pay for a lifetime supply of Oscar Meyer meat products."

"He's probably just some intern that got stuck with my duties for a few days," she reminded.

"Unacceptable." He shook his head. "He's lucky I don't have him blacklisted."

Her eyebrows raised, amusement coloring her voice as she asked, "Because of bologna?"

"My bologna has a first name and it's F-I-R-E-D."

"My bologna has a second name and it's S-L-E-E-P."

"Spoil sport. I'm fully awake and already preparing for round two."

"Appreciate the enthusiasm, really!" She gave him a thumbs-up. "But I've got work in the morning and you need to catch up on some zee's…" She patted his stomach. "That's an order."

He hummed. "I love it when you're bossy."

"Oh, I know," she said, smirking.

"Not helping to discourage round two, Lewis," he tisked.

"You'll survive." She moved to climb off the bed. "We should clean up and then get some sleep… I feel too sticky."

He watched her cross the room to their bathroom before he swung his legs off the bed and followed after her. While she was digging out a wash cloth, he stepped up behind her, his arms banded around her waist and his chin falling to her shoulder. He stared at her reflection a long moment, naked and covered in his love bites, mixed in with her bruises.

"I do love you," he said, his eyes a little wide with sincerity. He kissed her neck and sighed, his eyes falling closed. "Enough that I'll never make JARVIS a real man, because he will sweep you off your feet; it's the accent, I bet."

She laughed, leaning back against him. "No offense to JARVIS, but I'm pretty happy where I am."

"Good." He nodded. "Because I plan on keeping you around for a long time…" He raised an eyebrow. "Even if you  _won't_ risk our lives by inviting Romanov into play-time."

She grinned. "Geez, you save a man's life, and this is how he repays you…" she said, with a dramatic sigh.

"Apology sex?" he offered, wiggling his eyebrows.

With a laugh, she rolled her eyes. "Insatiable."

He smirked at her. "And you're welcome."

Darcy shrugged. "Appreciated."

After they untangled and cleaned up, they made their way back to bed and climbed in. Tony wrapped himself around her like the pro-snuggler she knew him to be, and it wasn't long before he fell into a much-needed sleep. She traced her fingers back and forth over his forearm and tried to stop smiling, repeating his words over and over in her head. Sure, she'd already known, but to hear him say it somehow made it so much better.

Closing her eyes, she gave a soft sigh of content.

Sure, there were no promises that either of them would live forever. They were both just fleshy humans. But somehow, she just knew that they would live long enough and that it would be spent together.

That was enough.

[ **End.** ]


End file.
